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Could you BEE more cliched?

April 10, 2010

As an Australian, you come to London and people say things such as: ‘oh you’re from the land of things that can seriously f*** you up.’ I always play up to this. ALWAYS! ‘I’ve been catching spiders since I was five,’ I’ll brag. Although that statement is true. It’s what you get for having a mum and two baby brothers who are arachnophobic pussies (sorry Tom and Jack – I know you’re big, muscled things now so please don’t hurt me). I also did my first dive in a shark tank when I was 20 which is also something you can impress Brits with. But the truth is, as a Sydneysider, I really don’t come in to contact with anything that could kill me. Unlike here, where in Summer I feel scared out of my mind about those bees. For people who haven’t come to UK, the bees here are like something out of a 1940s Japanese Horror film. They’re big and nasty and they make a beeline for you if you have anything remotely sweet. I’ve had one fly straight into my diet coke – yes, it was diet, the bees here don’t even mind sugar free – sweetner will do.

Now let’s have a think, how many people per year would be injured by a bee sting (due to allergies or otherwise) vs the amount of Aussies who have been injured by a shark, spider or snake? I’ve got no mathematical proof about any of this of course but I wouldn’t been surprised if they’re are more bee-related injuries than Aussie shark/spider ones. Those bees are relentless little buggers and they’ve got an advantage over our dangerous Australian wildlife – wings.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. tillybud permalink
    April 10, 2010 11:20 am

    Which kind of bee do you mean? We have lots of varieties. I think you might be talking about bumble bees, the chubby ones. They won’t hurt you if keep still; probably mistaking you for an exotic flower. Did you know it is illegal to kill them? Better get an extra straw for this summer.

    PS Seriously impressed at your shark diving exploits.

    • April 11, 2010 9:03 pm

      Oh wow, didn’t realise there was lots of bee varieties. Well, the bumble bee sounds pretty sweet so I’m glad they’re not aggro.

      Oh, and I like your blog :)

  2. Chris permalink
    April 17, 2010 1:39 pm

    I noticed you apologised to Tom & Jack about being arachnophobic but not me, but I know I’m not as muscled as they are. Of course we never want the spiders killed – just relocated, That’s why we call on your services as spider catcher . Remember my motto has always been… “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself … and spiders”. Mum x

    • April 18, 2010 12:15 pm

      Mum, it’s less embarrassing for a woman to be arachnophobic. hehe. That’s why you didn’t get an apology. Hope you’re safe from those spiders. Love love xoxox

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